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There is a lot happening in the media right now.

A lot.

With all that’s happening in the media (as well as my own world,) I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. I have so much to discuss, so many thoughts and feelings to share, that I literally could not decide on a blog by my deadline. A repeat trigger for me personally has been both the Bill Cosby verdict and comments regarding the Brett Kavanaugh trial. I will keep my comments to myself (for now.)

I have chosen not to hit y’all with the heavy shit this week because I believe that we need a detox. We need a break. All too often, we get so caught up in social media and shit that really doesn’t effect our immediate world, that we carry that energy around with us unnecessarily (we meaning me, lol. I won’t speak for y’all.) I was so upset this weekend over the comments people were making defending rape and comparing rape to prostitution that I almost threw my brand new phone at the wall.  I had to ask myself, why is this hitting me so hard? To be honest, I am taking the comments personal because I know women personally that have been abused and silenced, second guessed and dismissed, belittled and berated, all because the accused was an intimidating family member or someone so revered that to even hypothetically implicate said man/woman was inconceivably wild. Kinda like the reactions I’ve seen with people legit defending Cliff Huxtable and their reactions to the thought of Bill Cosby drugging and raping women. They can’t separate the two. It’s the same thing with R. Kelly, as he was referenced heavily as I comment creeped as well. There are black folks who truly believe that this is a conspiracy to bring black men down. Please know that I am 100% aware of the history of African-Americans in America, and that our history is full of innocent men having paid and/or currently paying for crimes that they in fact did not commit. To that, I quote the infamous words of Huey Freeman:

“Every famous ni**a that gets arrested is not Nelson Mandela! Yes, the government conspires to put a LOT of innocent black men in jail on fallacious charges, but R. Kelly is not one of those men!”

Damn!

If you need a break, I am encouraging you to take a break from social media and anything that may be a trigger. If you’re stressing over something that’s not as heavy as the topic above but equally trying, please take a break. Work related? Take a break. Relationship woes? Take a break. Life in general? Take a break. There are a lot of great books out right now (The Hate U Give, Homegoing, Sister Souljah’s Midnight Series and Small Great Things are all books I am recommending to all my friends right now!)

To any one of our readers that has been abused in any way, I am urging you to take a break from social media, or refresh and remove “friends” from your timelines that are triggering your trauma. I feel like an asshole saying that, because who am I to tell you how to cope, but it is what I am choosing to do. If you choose to stay active on social media, I hope you are doing something to soothe yourself when you log off. You shouldn’t have to defend your experiences to anyone, let alone a social media commentor who hasn’t had to live the life you’re living post abuse. I don’t know what else to say, so I won’t say anything else.

 

Peace y’all,

April B.