Cóphi Productions

Peace to y’all.

I am one year into my spiritual journey, and yo, let me tell y’all something: getting to the root of who I am and who I am destined to be, has NOT been easy.

There have been times where I’ve second (third, fourth and fifth) guessed myself and the path I’m taking. What will people think of me? Will they see me the same? Will I be the same? Should I share this journey with others? What are the pros? What are the cons? Why come this ain’t as easy as what I’ve already known?

I saw a post by Maliah (shout out to Maliah, I’m on fire, you should work tonight—that Maliah, lol) …

I saw a post by Maliah where she was expressing her objections to the idea of the Earth being round. A gentleman responded to her post with a comment that he undoubtedly learned from some sort of schooling. Maliah replied to his comment saying, “you can break that down that way, because that is what you’ve been taught. What do you know own your own?”

I’m paraphrasing, but what Maliah was saying is that it is easy for us to debate things like religion because we have been taught these things. What do we know on our own though? What knowledge of self and life have we gained through our own research?

That is where I am with my spirituality. I am on a journey to acquire knowledge of self, and the essential keys that will lead me to a prosperous life and legacy for generations to come. Prior to 2018, I believed in a God, but I’ve never really been religious. 

What got me started on this journey?

Picture it, Philly, 2018:

It’s 3 AM, and I’m tired. Tired of being the nice one. Tired of settling. Tired of being the mean one. Tired of snapping out. Tired of not saying how I really feel. Tired of pretending to be happy. Tired of forgiving. Tired of being tired. Just tide. Muhfuggin tide. I broke down in tears on my bathroom floor, and every piece of me, every broken piece of me, was digging so deep into me, and I just couldn’t take the pain any more. It was time for me to let go, to heal the wounds and get my butt up off of that floor.

I slowly began to embrace who I was, with the help of a friend who opened my eyes to embracing my ancestors and spirituality. So much peace has come into my life since then.

As humans, we all elevate, though not all of us do so intentionally. Sometimes, we are forced to move forward: we go through a break up, we fight with a friend, we lose a job. When these kinds of things happen, they’re usually out of our control, and they force us to let go and move forward into the next phase of our lives, whether we’re ready or not. Even with this, we don’t always grow. Sometimes, we find replacements that allow us to be the very reason we were fired or dumped in previous relationships and friendships. We find people that accept us at a level two, knowing damn well we should be at a five. This has been me on occasion, attracting people that accepted me at my lowest when others expected me to step it up.

On the flip side, though, there are times when we initiate the letting go, when we’re no longer comfortable in relationships, friendships, jobs or lifestyles we were once committed to. This has also been me, the one becoming uncomfortable and feeling like I no longer belonged at a job or aligned with relationships/friendships that were content with me vibrating at a lower level.

I have always been good at letting go of things, places and people, so long as I’m ready. As the self proclaimed block captain, it has never been an issue for me to walk away from anything or anyone that no longer serves me and block a sucka in a New York minute. What I have not always been good at is processing my feelings and letting go of things from an emotional standpoint. This is an important process to master, because when you’re not completely over an experience, those emotions can set you back. The process of healing can be tough, it’s not all sunshine and lollipops. There are dark days when you won’t be in the mood to be broken down and rebuilt, however necessary it may be. Accountability is also a very icky feeling, and it can be hard to admit that YOU are the reason shit is happening (or not happening) in your life. Keep that same energy you have for others and hold yourself accountable for the mistakes you make, but don’t sit in the woe for too long. Keep moving. Keep working towards the healing. Let go, even when you’re not ready. Don’t hold yourself back from ascension.

I say to you, dear readers, that wherever your journey takes you, do not allow anything or anyone to keep you from elevating. The journey I’ve embarked on has shown me many things. People will try to gaslight you—don’t fall for it. Gaslighting is when people play mental games with you. They’ll say you’re changing or that you’re not being true to yourself and have you questioning your sanity, when in all actuality, your growth scares the shit outta them, they can see that they can no longer manipulate you for their benefit. People may also be intimidated because they themselves aren’t standing in their own greatness, so they’ll tell you that you can’t or shouldn’t do things. Do what you can to help someone you love, but do not fall victim to their inability to grow and miss your blessings. That ain’t your cross to bear.

Also, please understand this: it is 100% OK to regress in life occasionally, as sometimes we need to go back a level or two to ensure a better present and/or future. If you gotta move back home to save money? Go home! Take a second or third job? Do it. You need a break from social media? DO IT. We breaking up with that boyfriend or girlfriend for the betterment of our mental health? DO IT! Take your time, breathe. See a therapist if need be. Whatever the case, stand tall and get shit done! We aint doing no more second guessing. Say that shit with ya chest when you feel you have been slighted—do not cower or clam up when you know and understand that you are being done wrong. Do not be afraid to speak your mind and mean that shit, because someone may very well need to hear what you’ve got to say.

And if you’re ever worried about people not liking ya or speaking to you again, especially if ya don’t really fuck with them anyway… well then, what are you really afraid of?